I’ve spent most of my career working with busy urban professionals. Despite superficial differences in demographics, there is a common thread connecting the people I work with: most of them are very stressed out. Sometimes, the inability to properly manage stress is the single biggest factor preventing my clients from achieving their goals at the gym.
Don’t believe me? I understand on a personal level just how devastating excessive stress can be. Recently, my own failure to manage stress created a cascade of negative consequences in my own life.
I started my blog and online training business in 2017 because I loved writing and wanted to share my ideas and experience with a broader audience. In an effort to build my business, I established weekly deadlines for myself. Each week I planned to write a new blog, send two emails to my list, post daily on social media, shoot a new video, and do a Facebook Live. This was in addition to writing programs for all my clients, answering emails, doing administrative work, and training all of my in-person clients. I was cranking out content left and right. If I wasn’t on the floor with a client, I was posted up in a coffee shop writing. I was at the gym 12-14 hours most days, and almost every single second was filled with work.
Over the course of many months, my self-imposed deadlines became more and more suffocating. After a while, I felt completely drained of ideas and creativity. Then, I started dreading my workouts and slacking at the gym. I lost interest in things that used to light me up and experienced near constant anxiety. It was increasingly difficult to sit still, and even harder to relax and unwind. I worried incessantly about nearly everything in my life.
I had taken on too much but refused to admit it. In my head, I had to do all the things if I wanted to be successful. I was running blindfolded toward a cliff ledge, but I still thought I could avoid falling off if I just worked harder. I refused to do anything about my stress levels and was arrogant enough to think I wouldn’t have to face any consequences for the way I was treating myself.
The turning point came when my failure to address my stress and anxiety contributed to the resurfacing of an old eating disorder. I gained weight, felt physically terrible, and stopped being able to show up the way I wanted in my work and my relationships. I could no longer live in denial because stress had clearly affected both my physical and mental health. My body and brain were sending me a strong message that something had to change. Among many other things, I started going to therapy and made drastic changes to the way I worked. Only after addressing my stress problem was I able to fall back in love with the gym and recommit to my health and fitness goals.
I share this story with you because I want you to see how poorly managed stress can stymie your efforts to look, feel, and perform better. You may think stress is no big deal, but left unchecked it can easily consume your life. If you’re trying to change your body, push performance, or build a healthier lifestyle, it’s absolutely essential to get a handle on your overall stress levels. Failure to do so will continuously sabotage your attempts at change and potentially lead to serious physical and mental health problems.
Below, I describe a few ways stress interferes with your progress in and out of the gym. I also share some of the stress management strategies that have been most helpful for myself and my clients.
How does stress stop me from getting in shape?
The presence of excessive stress hormones can have a direct impact on your physiology. What’s easier to understand, however, are the insidious ways stress affects your overall well being. These things make it hard to lose weight, get stronger, recover from injuries, or build healthier habits.
One of the first side effects of high stress levels is poor sleep. When you’re stressed out, it’s harder to fall asleep and stay asleep. This has negative implications for your entire life because without sleep, your body and brain can’t fully recover from the demands of your workouts, job, and personal life. You’ll feel worn down, beat up, and struggle to keep up with daily activities.
Sleep is especially important for body composition goals like losing fat or building muscle. If a client’s diet and training are on point but they’re struggling to see physical changes, I can often trace it back to a lack of sleep.
It’s tough to stick with a diet or nutrition plan when you’re stressed out. For some people, excessive stress makes it even harder to find the time and energy to plan, shop, and prepare healthy meals. Other people are so stressed they skip breakfast or lunch, only to overeat later in the day.
Sometimes stress itself causes powerful cravings for sweets and other comfort foods. Eating these foods causes a chemical reaction in your brain, releasing “feel good” neurotransmitters and hormones which provide a stress-relieving rush. Unfortunately, this feeling is only temporary and is usually followed by an energy crash and feelings of guilt. Left unchecked, this cycle can eventually spiral into full-blown disordered eating.
In addition to affecting sleep, recovery, and your ability to stick to a diet, excessive stress has a negative impact on your workouts. First, stress reduces your energy levels and performance. You’ll likely move slower, feel sluggish, and have a hard time focusing on technique. Additionally, it’s hard to give your all at the gym (such as attempting new personal records or testing your strength and endurance) when your nervous system is exhausted from a persistent high dose of stress. In fact, too much high intensity training combined with high levels of overall stress from elsewhere in your life is a recipe for disaster (more on this below).
Second, stress can impact your motivation to train. If you have a million things on your plate or feel overwhelmed by life, working out is often the last thing you want to do. Although no one feels motivated all the time, something isn’t right if you find yourself constantly dreading the gym.
Finally, if you’re not careful, unchecked stress can compound and lead to serious physical and mental health problems. These problems require legitimate medical attention and can potentially sideline you from pursuing other goals.
It’s easy to tell yourself this only happens to other people to justify your lack of self-care. However, my story provides a warning that we are all at risk. Because I was in denial and went so long without managing my own stress levels, I’m now knee-deep in the work of recovering from an eating disorder. I know I have to make progress with this before I can recommit to my long term weight loss goals. If I don’t, the problems will only resurface in the future.
If you suspect your stress levels may be negatively impacting your physical and mental health, do yourself a favor and start experimenting with some of the stress management techniques below.
Ok, so I’m stressed out. What can I do about it?
Just breathe. My favorite in-the-moment stress reduction technique is to focus on slow, deep breathing. Breathe in for a count of five, hold your breath for a count of five, exhale slowly for a count of five, and then hold empty for another count of five before repeating the cycle. Returning to the breath, especially in moments of heightened anxiety and fear, reminds me I’m still alive and everything will be ok. It leaves me feeling calm enough to return to work with a level head. Try it out yourself the next time you find your stress levels building to a crescendo.
Get more sleep. This is one of the easiest things you can do to feel better on a daily basis. Most adults feel best with 7-9 hours of sleep each night. Don’t underestimate the power of short naps to fill in the gaps helps you get through the day if you have trouble getting this much sleep at night.
Read more: Make this one change and everything gets easier
Don’t overdo it at the gym. Your body doesn’t know the difference between work stress, personal stress, and the stress from your workouts. If you’re going through a rough patch, it’s a bad idea to crush yourself with hard workouts every day of the week. This is a guaranteed way to run yourself into the ground, risking burnout and injuries along the way. When in doubt, reduce the intensity and frequency of your training sessions. Skip the high intensity interval training and focus on restorative low intensity cardio like easy walking or cycling. Don’t try to set personal records; you may also consider temporarily removing barbells from your workouts.
Create a daily self-care/stress management practice. We are all extremely busy, but it’s important to make time to do something most days that’s just for you. My practice is simple: I try to meditate for 10-20 minutes and read for at least 10 minutes every day. If I don’t do this, I find myself getting too wrapped up in work or in my own head. Some people like to take a leisurely walk or spend time outside. Others call loved ones to vent or catch up. Some of my friends treat themselves to a face mask or relaxing bath. The key is to pick activities which leave you feeling refreshed and recharged; this shouldn’t feel like a chore. Start small and experiment to see what works best for you.
Manage your time and energy. This is the place where my clients struggle the most with stress management. If you struggle to set boundaries, you will inevitably find yourself pulled in a million directions. Managing your energy levels is crucial because it helps you prevent the accumulation of stress in the first place.
To start this process, get honest about what’s really important to you. Many of us waste tons of time with stressful busywork and tasks which add little value to our work or personal lives. You may benefit from doing an audit of your week to see where you’re really spending your time. Whenever possible, delegate tasks or ask for help from coworkers, friends, and family. Practice saying no to things that don’t serve you or drain your precious mental and emotional energy. If you’re used to constantly capitulating to requests, this can be jarring and scary at first. It’s worth the temporary discomfort, however, if the result is less stress, more time to focus on the things that matter most, and greater respect from the people in your life.
Finally, I encourage you to find ways to do less. It was (and still is) incredibly challenging for me to cut back on my expectations for myself and take on less work. However, I’ve learned that I can’t and don’t need to get everything done. Do the things you have to do and leave the rest. Don’t forget to set aside time for rest, relaxation, connection, and play.
Therapy. There are lots of misconceptions about what therapy is all about; like many people, I used to believe that only people with serious illness or those processing grief or trauma went to therapy. The reality is therapists provide a wide variety of services and support for people in every imaginable life situation. One of the biggest benefits I’ve gotten from going to therapy is learning to better manage stress. I worked with my therapist to take an honest look at how I structured my work day and readjust the expectations I set for myself.
If life feels out of control for any reason, it’s ok to ask for professional help. Having an impartial third party can help you manage your time and energy, improve your communication skills with coworkers and loved ones, and get more in touch with what really matters to you.
In today’s #hustleandgrind culture, it’s easy to feel like work never ends and there’s no time for rest. But the reality is no one can maintain this nonstop pace indefinitely. Humans are wired to alternate between periods of hard work and focus and periods of down time and relaxation. Pushing through limits for too long can create a host of negative effects in many areas of your life. If you don’t make time to take care of yourself and manage your stress levels, you will have a hard time achieving any health or fitness goal. You owe it to yourself to take an honest look at your stress and figure out a sustainable, healthy path forward.
Regular exercise is an essential part of any self-care practice. If you’re struggling to build a consistent training routine, you should check out my 4C System Course. This free 5-day email course teaches you the tools I use to help my clients become lifelong lovers of exercise.